Nine Dumbest Florida Criminals of 2014

Ah, Florida. We have criminals, just like every other state. But we have our own special kind of criminal. Namely, dumb ones. And because we’re never in short supply of dumb criminals, we’ve decided to scour through our Floriderp files to present to you the nine dumbest criminals for all…

Palm Beach Teen Calls 911 Over PlayStation Outage

Sony’s PlayStation Network was shut down during Christmas after a hacker group infiltrated the company’s system and brought everything to a grinding halt. As you might imagine, it was a major pain in the ass for people who wanted to log onto the network and play their videogames. But this…

Hollywood Police Conducting DUI Operation Tonight

It’s New Year’s Eve awwwriiiight! That means counting down 2015, family, friends, noise makers, party hats, and booze. But mostly, it’s about booze. What it doesn’t mean is getting sloshed and then getting in your car. That would be dumb for multiple reasons. So, to make sure you don’t do…

Top Ten South Florida Sports Moments of 2014

Let’s face it. 2014 was a big heaping pile of crap of a sports year for us down here. The Heat got destroyed in the Finals, which led to LeBron James’ leaving for Cleveland. The Dolphins still suck. The Marlins missed the playoffs and lost their star player for the…

Seven New Year’s Resolutions for Florida for 2015

The new year is just around the corner, which means IT’S RESOLUTION TIME. That’s right, folks. Time to buckle down, grab some pen and paper, and start writing down all the things you resolve to do in 2015 to better your life. And while most of us will give up…

SeaWorld Orca Sanctuary Solution Offered by PETA Stockholders

Earlier this year, the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA), which owns shares of SeaWorld Entertainment Inc., tried to propose a solution for the park’s ongoing public criticism over its treatment of captive orcas: the creation of a coastal retirement sanctuary for SeaWorld’s killer whales. The proposal was…

Florida Ordered to Respond to Same-Sex-Marriage Issue by Today

U.S. District Judge Robert Hinkle has ordered Florida to respond on its position concerning his ruling on same-sex marriage by today, Monday, December 29. Particularly, Hinkle is waiting for a response on whether county clerks will be legally allowed to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples come January 6. Earlier…

Stephen Ross’ Faith in Joe Philbin Is Killing the Dolphins

Miami Dolphins owner Stephen Ross is either blind, indifferent, or nuts. One would have to be, no? The NFL season for the Dolphins has come and gone and, exactly as we predicted, Miami finished with an 8-8 record and failure to once again enter the playoffs. And as it is…

Report: String of Armed Robberies Around Las Olas Boulevard

A string of armed robberies have been going down in Las Olas lately, according to an announcement from Las Olas Village, a group that describes itself as an “urban renewal project dedicated to revitalizing a key section” of the area. The group is calling for a bigger police presence in…

Rand Paul is Going Off on Marco Rubio on Social Media Over Cuba

Barack Obama’s announcement that the U.S. and Cuba are moving forward to improve diplomatic relations has gotten Marco Rubio all hot and bothered. Rubio has been the leading voice in speaking out and criticizing the president’s decision to thaw relations with the island nation. He’s called Obama the worst negotiator…

Satanic Invocation Could Come to Almost Every City in Florida

Satan could be coming to your city’s commission meeting very soon. Atheist and blogger Chaz Stevens was recently given the go-ahead by Lake Worth to lead a Satanic invocation before one of their upcoming meetings. And, with his foot firmly in the proverbial door, Stevens is looking to knock down…

Miami Dolphins Drinking Game For the Remainder of the Season

The Miami Dolphins aren’t technically eliminated from playoff contention. That is to say, they still have a mathematical shot to get in, as long as the Steelers, Ravens, Chiefs and Colts all die in plane crashes and their stadiums are collectively swallowed by sink holes. THEN THERE’S DEFINITELY A CHANCE…