When you hit a certain age — let’s call it 18 — it’s illegal to chase 15-year-old girls. Stalking is pretty much always illegal.Aysar Aktimur, 49, apparently missed those memos, according to what the Boca Raton Police Department has to say.The cops say Aktimur would follow the teenaged girl around…
Tim Tebow is quite possibly more popular than God himself — at least, he may be in Florida.The former Florida Gator, Heisman Trophy winner, two-time BCS national champion, and current Denver Broncos quarterback is viewed favorably by 59 percent of Floridians, according to survey results released this afternoon by Public…
During Gov. Rick Scott’s announcement of his budget proposal today, he took questions from media members curious about his ideas.One of those people asking questions ended up being Aasif Mandvi, a “correspondent” for the Daily Show With Jon Stewart.He wanted to know, of course, whether the governor would pee into…
Get this: The government creates a secret bank account for every person issued a birth certificate in the United States — and has been doing so since the enactment of the 1936 Social Security Act — that holds $630,000. Through a series of IRS filings, people can become entitled to…
Clinton Travis Drake, 19, was arrested yesterday by the Cape Coral Police Department on Monday, accused of bludgeoning his 84-year-old grandfather to death with a hammer. This is now the second hammer-murder of a relative allegedly carried out by a teenaged family member, after 17-year-old Port St. Lucie resident Tyler…
Rep. Allen Bernard West is back to putting the “Hussein” in “Barack Hussein Obama,” this time in a complaint about the president’s ripping on Republicans’ economic stances in a speech yesterday.Quite simply, Obama said the theory of trickle-down economics just doesn’t work, and he’s not down with keeping up the…
Since a Florida group managed to collect only around 20,000 of the 676,811 signatures needed to put the state’s own version of a “personhood” amendment before the voters, they’re ditching that one and starting over again.Initiative petition laws have now changed, making signatures for such petitions valid for only two…
Well, this gentleman to our left doesn’t want to leave the “Christ” out of any title designating time off from school.If anyone’s ever looking to argue that the Florida Senate wastes its time on things that aren’t relevant to Florida, or Planet Earth, point to Senate Bill 1136, submitted today…
Who says there aren’t any jobs out there?If you’ve got an email address and have managed to avoid being arrested, you can get a job in Palm Beach County (or Martin County) now.All you have to do is capture some alligators…
Gov. Rick Scott is still the least-popular governor in the country, but according to the latest poll released this afternoon, it’s the crappiest approval rating he’s ever had.Scott’s approval is down to 26 percent of Floridians, according to the freshest numbers from Public Policy Polling, easily defeating his previous most-crappy…
There’s currently a 76-comment long thread on Occupy Fort Lauderdale’s Facebook page about New Times’ coverage of the group’s choice to comply with a new city rule that effectively bans tents from the occupation spot at City Hall.Among the things discussed are what’s apparently a rift in the group over…
It’s been more than four years since Andrew Meyer’s famous “Don’t tase me, bro” moment at the University of Florida, but on Friday, bro, Darrel Horne wanted the Taser.According to Brandon Haught of the Volusia County Sheriff’s Office, Horne’s moment came after diving naked into a lake in an attempt…
Rep. Allen West completed the half-marathon at the Palm Beaches Marathon Festival this weekend at a time that places his half-marathon ability somewhere between Sarah Palin and Oprah.West was showing off the thighs during the race — possibly NSFW picture can be found here — cruising to a final time…
Civil disobedience (noun) 1. “The refusal to obey certain laws or governmental demands for the purpose of influencing legislation or government policy, characterized by the employment of such nonviolent techniques as boycotting, picketing, and nonpayment of taxes.”That’s what Occupy Fort Lauderdale didn’t do.After losing the challenge to a city rule…
Carl Pelini — the former defensive coordinator and defensive line coach at Nebraska — is officially the new head coach of the Florida Atlantic University Owls.Replacing the retiring Howard Schnellenberger, Pelini signed a five-year contract that starts with a $450,000 base salary.Pelini becomes the second coach in the history of…
Democratic National Committee Chairwoman Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz is a finalist for PolitiFact’s 2011 “Lie of the Year” award(?), thanks to her accusation that Republicans want “Jim Crow laws.”Wasserman Schultz joins President Obama — who was nominated twice — as well as Rep. Michele Bachmann, Sen. Jon Kyl, Texas Gov…
Allegedly for sale: Kenia Quiala Bosque’s 8-month-old boy. $7,000 or best offer.On Saturday night, someone phoned up the Monroe County Sheriff’s Office to tell them Bosque, 30, was about to meet a man in Miami to sell her kid to him.According to the Florida Department of Law Enforcement, they sent…
Gov. Rick Scott’s prediction that Herman Cain would become the next president of the United States didn’t quite come true.Cain announced this weekend that he was “suspending” his presidential campaign after yet another woman decided to go public about her encounters with him — this time, a woman alleging a…
After finding a cat’s head on the 14th fairway of the Port Charlotte Golf Club — the sixth dismembered feline found on the course since October — the cops are going public in their search for the serial mutilator.According to the Charlotte County Sheriff’s Office, it received a call around…
Buzz Bake Sale 16With Awolnation, Seether, Chevelle, Hinder, Everlast, Adelita’s Way, Art of Dying, Middle Class Rut, Falling in Reverse, and OneCruzan Amphitheatre, West Palm BeachSaturday, December 3, 2011View a slideshow from the event here.Better than: Being so far away.Awolnation saved the 16th edition of the Buzz Bake Sale –…
Fort Lauderdale Police Officer Kevin Pisano was arrested at 11:20 p.m. yesterday after allegedly delivering prescription pills — while in his police uniform, sitting in his marked police car — to a confidential informant across the street from the New Times office.Fort Lauderdale Police Detective Travis Mandell says the department’s…
Former Miami Dolphins defensive lineman Igor Olshansky was arrested yesterday afternoon — the day after he was waived by the team — becoming the second former Fin to be arrested this week, after ex-wide receiver David Boston was popped for allegedly punching a woman.Olshansky, 29, was one of 280 people…
